I’m getting the IV Port placed (I like to say “installed”) Friday morning at 10:00. That’ll be weird but I’m sure it will be easier in the long run.

Sleep, glorious sleep. I felt like Eeyore last night and just didn’t want to do a thing. Fortunately, Honey was in an industrious mood when he got home from work so, instead of the usual, “What do you want to do for dinner?” discussion and me begging him to do the dishes for me, he just came straight in the door, started cooking a tasty surprise dinner and did all of the dishes in the kitchen without me even hinting at it! He was Super Honey last night! Hmmm…I wonder what he wants? Hehehe

Anyway, I got plenty of good sleep last night and this morning I feel human and revved up again. It seems that my energy level is peaked in the mornings but by one or two o’clock in the afternoon I turn into a puddle of super sleepy goo.

Alright…get ready cause here comes a whole bunch of information that you may not even want to know but I want to get it down here so I have it to look back on later! If you are the researchy-type and want to learn more about these scientific names I spew out here, or if you are already familiar with any of them, by all means, have a go at them and leave me comments or emails about what you find out or know!

In Houston, Dr. Curley recommended the following combination of chemo drugs (aka “cocktail”):
Gemzar/gemcitabine
5-FU (Well, F-U, too, cancer!)
Cisplatin
and added on to all that an angiogenesis inhibitor (to help stop the blood supply to the tumor to prevent further growth): Avastin

Now, this wasn’t the first time we’ve heard Gemzar and 5FU as a treatment so those seem pretty standard. But Dr. Kane is questioning the Cisplatin and is otherwise suggesting we use Oxaliplatin. And she’s not sure my insurance will cover the use of Avastin but she’s looking into it.

She presented my case to the Tumor Board at the CU Med Center early this morning and all the surgeons in attendance agreed that this isn’t resectable at this time. Everyone agreed that attempting to shrink the tumor by means of chemotherapy was the best way to start. The idea of something called “Chemo Embalization” came up. I’ve heard this technique previously as well. Basically, it boils down to this: we can attack this tumor systemically or regionally. Systemic involves the aforementioned cocktail infusion that will dance through my whole entire body, aiming it’s firepower at any cancers in my body. This is ideal because we can’t know for certain if the cancer on my liver has spread elsewhere yet and if it has, then this covers all my bases. Unfortunately, this is the one that comes with all the nasty side effects: nausea, vomitting, hair loss, fatigue, etc. Mostly because it’s going through the whole body and lasts a long time, which is why I can go a week or more between infusions. The second option, regional, is just that: a regional attack directly at the tumor source. The docs thread a needle directly to the hepatic vessels and inject the chemo right to the incoming blood supply to the tumor. However, it would only attack the tumor, leaving any possibilities of satellite infection elsewhere in my body free to do as they will. I need to consult with an Interventional Radiologist to find out more about this procedure.

Right now, we’re all in agreement that the systemic chemo cocktail infusion is the best course of initial treatment at this time. If, after one or two cycles it doesn’t seem to be working as well as we want it to, we can try the chemo embalization. Then, if that fails, we’ll move on to proton radiation.

To be perfectly honest, this is the first time I’ve looked up the specific chemo drugs on the web mostly because I didn’t want to freak myself out too much before committing to start treatment! But also, since I’m being so honest here, I was all revved up and ready to start treatment ASAP…yesterday. Then once the doc agreed and started the process of approvals and scheduling and what not, then I got scared and sort of felt like screeching my brakes to a halt! WHOA NOW! Seriously. I’m agreeing to have nasty poisonous drugs pumped through my body on a regular basis so that I can feel like I have the flu while going bald constantly for months on end?! Who’s wacko idea was this?! What am I doing here?! Who are you people?! Yeah Yeah, I know what you’re going to say…it’s all normal to feel that way. The fear creeps up and taps me on the shoulder every once in a while, randomly, when I least expect it. I can accept that frequent flirtation with the fear but the key is that I don’t cave and give into it. I will not let my fear of chemo stop me from going through with it. I can handle fear, flu, baldness, miserable days, if it will help me rid my body of this cancer! Hell ya! I can do anything!

Okay, now I’m tired again. Must rest a bit now.